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(Posted as NazcaFlame)
Posts: 170/562
(23-Jul-2003 at 19:16)


question Raising Children, and Religion

What do you guys think is the ideal way to raise children with religion?
I mean, fairly, not just teach them the divinity that is God, because that would not be giving them a chance to decide without having their mind permanently brainwashed by their parents.
I think that it shouldn't even really be brought up until a certain age of maturity...Then, you could teach your child about all the world religions without bias, and reminding them that they are not limited to this, as they do not need to pick a religion, nor do they have to only take one that already exists.
No bias, methinks, and it avoids the "My grandparents were Christian, they brainwashed my parents, who brainwashed me, and I'll brainwash MY kids".
Lets kids pick what they believe.
The only problem with this is that some people might think it supports Aethiest beliefs, by not bringing up religion until a certain point of maturity.
Well, does anybody have suggestions on what would be better for being fair in religion teaching?

Belief, "faith" if you will, is pointless unless founded by fact, and once founded by fact no longer becomes belief. - Lunar2
I'm not a hero, I'm not a saviour - Forget what you know - I'm just a man whose circustances went beyond his control.
Welcome to Tycho-Magnetic Anamoly One.
#1  
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(23-Jul-2003 at 19:36)


thats what happened to me

My grandparents on my mothers side were diehard farmers I mean they were raised farmers in the Great Depression my grandfather worked 18 hours before he got cancer and then he only cut back to 10. So religion was never of great importance there (no time always working)

On my fathers side it's was the oppsite my fathers parents they were devout methodists espacially my grandmother who to this day asks me if I went to church that sunday.


But after my parents divorce. My mom got custody so she brought me up in the kind of indifferent attiude that she was raised in. So here I am now Christian because of my own faith not because of my parent's faith

militant Liberal Christian..funny string of words I got there
"when life gives you Lemons eat them whole..Peal and all"
-the great Ipoc
UNITE! SPARK THE FIRE!
#2  
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(23-Jul-2003 at 19:52)


I think it's the parents responsibility to be unbiased, and raise their child without the influence of religion until, say, 10 years old, then educate them about all the mainstream religions (includng atheism, agnostic etc.), and allow them to make their own decision.

Ignorance, the root and the stem of every evil - Plato
Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.
Only Sheep need a shepherd!
Religion is like communism: Good idea, bad execution
#3  
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(23-Jul-2003 at 20:10)
We tend to be the most receptive to new ideas as children. Studies show that younger people learn languages faster, for instance, and it's often the oldest people who resist new technologies.

As a result, it's somehow unsatisfactory to expose children to something so fundamental to their beliefs so late in their lives. By ten years of age, children have already formed many of their most important ideals.

Furthermore, how would one shield a child for that long? If there are older children in the house, and those children follow Christianity, do you hide the nine-year-olds when Christmas rolls around? What would parents do with their kids every week (perhaps more often) when they go to a church, synogogue, or whatever their place of worship?

On another note, there are many, many religions in the world. Thousands of denominations exist under the umbrella of Christianity alone. No parent could hope to cover the smallest fraction of these in enough detail for a child (of 10) to make an intelligent decision. And that's assuming that a ten-year-old *has* the intelligence to make such a decision, which I do not believe it does. (It's pretty clear that a lot of us never do.)


The idea holds some theoretical merit, but it's practically unworkable in all but a superficial way.
#4  
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(Posted as NazcaFlame)
Posts: 172/562
(23-Jul-2003 at 20:16)


careless

Well of course, there are a couple logical things in the way, as of course, you can't just send them to Billy's house when Christmas rolls around. I don't know how many opinions a child has formed by age 10, though...

Belief, "faith" if you will, is pointless unless founded by fact, and once founded by fact no longer becomes belief. - Lunar2
I'm not a hero, I'm not a saviour - Forget what you know - I'm just a man whose circustances went beyond his control.
Welcome to Tycho-Magnetic Anamoly One.
#5  
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(Posted as jh211988)
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(24-Jul-2003 at 00:57)


Better to be unbiased, coz' it's better to let them choose, otherwise, Atheists will come flaming us over and over again.

Nah, just kidding. Anyway, I am Christian because of my own faith. My father's a Buddhist, and my mom's a monoatheist. But I chose to go at it myself.

Ironically, I find the situation to be reverse. I'm trying to convert my parents, but my parents are not converting me...

Religion is the mental disease of the masses.
"Once again, religion is like sniffing gasoline. Both cause permanant brain damage." -- Obsidian
#6  
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(24-Jul-2003 at 04:19)


The way I plan on doing it (My daughter is 3), is that my daughter will know that I am Wiccan, she will also know that her father and his family is Christian, and that my fiance is athiest. I plan on teaching her about all Religions, that is one of the reasons I started coming to these forums, to learn more about the other Religions out there. I will then let her choose what Religion fits best with her. To me this seems like the only fair way to do it.

Fight the Fear
Freedom of Religion means ALL Religions
Proud member of the Wiccan Religion
#7  
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(Posted as dravid)
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(24-Jul-2003 at 04:27)
First of all let me say that there is absolutely no way that a parent could remain unbiased. If a parent believes one thing to be true and another false, do you think they would be able to teach both points of view with the same conviction? Not to mention the fact that if they believe they are right, would they want their children to believe in what is wrong?

And I also resent the fact that you say children are brainwashed. Sure it may happen, but as a natural part of life we tend to question things. Growing up in a Christian family, I have seen many people that I know come to a stage when they start questioning what they have been taught. Some become Christians, some leave the church all together.
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(24-Jul-2003 at 04:36)


Quote:
(Originally posted by dravid)

First of all let me say that there is absolutely no way that a parent could remain unbiased. If a parent believes one thing to be true and another false, do you think they would be able to teach both points of view with the same conviction? Not to mention the fact that if they believe they are right, would they want their children to believe in what is wrong?

And I also resent the fact that you say children are brainwashed. Sure it may happen, but as a natural part of life we tend to question things. Growing up in a Christian family, I have seen many people that I know come to a stage when they start questioning what they have been taught. Some become Christians, some leave the church all together.
This is not true. I was able to teach my friend in an unbiased way about other Religions out there. It depends on the person whether or not they can be unbiased. I sat with my friend for a few hours discussing Religions because she knows nothing about Religions other than Christianity except for the fact that they exist. We talked about this because I asked her one day what Religion her boyfriend is (he's from India), because I always love to meet new people from different Religions so that I can learn more about them. She didn't know so I sat there and told her what I knew about all the Religions I knew anything about. I left out my personal thoughts and only gave her what I knew to be facts, I plan on doing the same exact thing with my daughter.

Fight the Fear
Freedom of Religion means ALL Religions
Proud member of the Wiccan Religion
#9  
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(Posted as NazcaFlame)
Posts: 196/562
(24-Jul-2003 at 04:42)


Quote:
(Originally posted by Kallie)

This is not true. I was able to teach my friend in an unbiased way about other Religions out there. It depends on the person whether or not they can be unbiased. I sat with my friend for a few hours discussing Religions because she knows nothing about Religions other than Christianity except for the fact that they exist. We talked about this because I asked her one day what Religion her boyfriend is (he's from India), because I always love to meet new people from different Religions so that I can learn more about them. She didn't know so I sat there and told her what I knew about all the Religions I knew anything about. I left out my personal thoughts and only gave her what I knew to be facts, I plan on doing the same exact thing with my daughter.
I wish you the best of luck!

Belief, "faith" if you will, is pointless unless founded by fact, and once founded by fact no longer becomes belief. - Lunar2
I'm not a hero, I'm not a saviour - Forget what you know - I'm just a man whose circustances went beyond his control.
Welcome to Tycho-Magnetic Anamoly One.
#10  
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(24-Jul-2003 at 05:26)


i'm a Christian (somewhat) but i do not like the idea of feeding my child with any religion. i'll let him explore and study that on his own with proper guidance of course. whichever religion he chooses, or if he doesn't choose at all, that's fine with me...(as long as the reasons are rational). basically, i think all i need to teach him are the basic ideals of philosophy...
#11  
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(24-Jul-2003 at 05:34)


If you truly believe your religion to be the absolute truth, it would be irresponsible to not teach it to your children. If you think your religion might be wrong, then that's different.

"To be conscious that you are ignorant is a great step to knowledge" -Disraeli
"As for me, all I know is that I know nothing" - Socrates
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(24-Jul-2003 at 10:45)


Well my parents are orthodoxic christians(which i think is the best form of xtianity)and i am very happy with they way they raised me.They never forced religion on me they just explained me the basics of xtianity and whats it's all about and let me believe whatver i want to believe.
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Donated $5.32
(24-Jul-2003 at 16:25)


Quote:
(Originally posted by TyBrad11)

If you truly believe your religion to be the absolute truth, it would be irresponsible to not teach it to your children. If you think your religion might be wrong, then that's different.

Who the hell would follow a religion if they didn't believe in it? Its not exactly a faith then..



Its not really possible to be unbiased about your faith that is true, but it is possible to present your child with good morals while they are too young to understand the nuances of religion, and when they are older, present them with the different choices.

-For those who fight all over the world.. fight for peace, fight for freedom, and fight for their lives..
Will someone please give Bush a BJ already so we can start the Impeachment?
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(Posted as jh211988)
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(24-Jul-2003 at 16:27)


Quote:
(Originally posted by muirgein)

Who the hell would follow a religion if they didn't believe in it? Its not exactly a faith then..



Its not really possible to be unbiased about your faith that is true, but it is possible to present your child with good morals while they are too young to understand the nuances of religion, and when they are older, present them with the different choices.
At the same time, share the blessings you get. So that the child knows what happens to Christians like the back of his hand.

Don't force him with a cane though..., whipping them is just plain stupid. My bassist has such parents, he'd get a taste of the whip if he left church, and I find it totally wrong. It'd only make the child fear the religion more.

Religion is the mental disease of the masses.
"Once again, religion is like sniffing gasoline. Both cause permanant brain damage." -- Obsidian
#15  
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(24-Jul-2003 at 23:59)


Quote:
(Originally posted by Kallie)

The way I plan on doing it (My daughter is 3), is that my daughter will know that I am Wiccan, she will also know that her father and his family is Christian, and that my fiance is athiest. I plan on teaching her about all Religions, that is one of the reasons I started coming to these forums, to learn more about the other Religions out there. I will then let her choose what Religion fits best with her. To me this seems like the only fair way to do it.
That's the perfect way to raise children with religion, let them decide on their own. That should really help your child discover their own path.

~Duke Drake~
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(Posted as The Big T)
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(25-Jul-2003 at 05:08)


Well, like some people have already said, how can a parent not be bias?

If you (as a parent) truly believe that your religion is true, why in the world would you not want your children to know that truth? I would surely hope that people live their religions because they believe it. I believe parents ought to teach their kids what they believe, if it IS what they believe to be the truth. The children will eventually grow up. If they decide for themselves to discover the truth of their religion, that's one choice. If they choose to abandon religion or change, that's another choice. But just because someone is raised in a religion doesn't mean they're "brainwashed".

If a parent was teaching their kid that 2 + 2 = 4, how could they say, "hey, listen little Jimmy, I know what 2 + 2 is, but I'm going to let you believe for as long as you want that 2 + 2 = 3 or 5 or 6 or whatever you want. I won't ever intervene, and whatever you decide is right for you."

Truth is truth. If a parent truly believes their religion to be the truth, damn them if they don't teach their children.


__________
--Go BYU--
__________

Last edited by Trevor da Coug, 25-Jul-2003 at 05:09.
Edit reason: nuthin' better to do
#17  
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(Posted as The Big T)
Posts: 290/325
(25-Jul-2003 at 05:11)


Quote:
At the same time, share the blessings you get. So that the child knows what happens to Christians like the back of his hand.

Don't force him with a cane though..., whipping them is just plain stupid. My bassist has such parents, he'd get a taste of the whip if he left church, and I find it totally wrong. It'd only make the child fear the religion more.

Precisely. A parent can't and shouldn't force religion. Someone ought to fear God more than their parents, IMO.


__________
--Go BYU--
__________
#18  
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(25-Jul-2003 at 07:14)


question Can you be unbiased?

Ultimately, and unfortunately, being completely unbiased in the way you raise your kids is impossible. If a kid grows up around the house with one religion, then that religion they will almost always be. Also, kids can't truly understand most religions until they are fairly old. Even if you try to expose your kid to every religion at a young age, they will still choose mommy's religion; or some other religion for an pseudo-profound reason. Besides, even if the parents are "exposing" their children to other religions, what parent doesn't want their kid following the same religion as them? There too it's nearly impossible to be unbiased in some way. Ultimately it's impossible to be unbiased when raising kids. One can only hope that some day, everyone (seriously) takes a look at what they believe vs. the facts; and that they learn to think for themselves.
(And some people obviously never do learn to think for themselves.)

"To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me."
-Charles William Stubbs
"'Faith' means not wanting to know what is true."
-Friedrich Nietzsche
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(Posted as jh211988)
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(25-Jul-2003 at 07:51)


Re: Can you be unbiased?

Quote:
(Originally posted by TheTitan)

Ultimately, and unfortunately, being completely unbiased in the way you raise your kids is impossible. If a kid grows up around the house with one religion, then that religion they will almost always be. Also, kids can't truly understand most religions until they are fairly old. Even if you try to expose your kid to every religion at a young age, they will still choose mommy's religion; or some other religion for an pseudo-profound reason. Besides, even if the parents are "exposing" their children to other religions, what parent doesn't want their kid following the same religion as them? There too it's nearly impossible to be unbiased in some way. Ultimately it's impossible to be unbiased when raising kids. One can only hope that some day, everyone (seriously) takes a look at what they believe vs. the facts; and that they learn to think for themselves.
(And some people obviously never do learn to think for themselves.)
My parents told me I was Buddhist, but I found absolutely no faith in Buddha.

As such, I chose Atheism, and I was the opposite of all religions.

In the end, Christianity, because that's where I found true faith.

Religion is the mental disease of the masses.
"Once again, religion is like sniffing gasoline. Both cause permanant brain damage." -- Obsidian
#20  
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